5 Life Lessons I Learned from my Garden

They tried to bury us. They didn’t know we were seeds ~Mexican proverb

My garden is my sanctuary. As I wander down the stone path, through the trees to the garden, I always get a feeling of uplifting calm. The quiet peace allows me to breathe and absorb life in a whole new way. I can sit and reflect on the day, do some mindfulness meditation while watering, or even take my frustrations out on those darn weeds in the tomato bed. Many days, I look on in awe as I create life through the simple ingredients of light, soil, water, and seeds.

The simplicity of my garden helps me to reflect on life on a deeper level.  What does it all mean? Why are we here? And over the past few years, I’ve learned many a life lesson from my garden (sometimes the hard way when nothing grows!) They may open your eyes to the simplicity of life in a whole new way.

My happy place

1 – Things grow faster with a little rain

Bad weather always seems to last forever. When it rains, it pours, and it feels like the sun will NEVER come out again. Winter in New England is like this…it drags…and drags…and draaaaaaaaags on forever.

But you know what? Seasons change. Even though it’s raining now, it will not rain forever. If you hunker down and hang on long enough, the sun will indeed show its happy little face again.

Weathering a few storms only helps us grow. Personally, professionally, and spiritually you can’t grow unless you have some challenges along the way. My melanoma was a HUGE challenge for me – and I can honestly say it was probably the best life-altering challenge I could have asked for. It changed my whole outlook on life and I am a happier/stronger/better person now because of it.

Did I think that way during the hailstorm of treatment and doctors’ visits and scans and sickness? Heck no! I just hunkered down and rode it out. But I never let the rain bring me down.

2 – Keep pulling those pesky weeds!!

Every gardener will let you know how much they HATE weeds. Weeds are nothing but pesky little nutrient-suckers that steal the life out of whatever else you’re trying to grow. They create an unnecessary competition for your plants that will overpower them if you don’t keep weeds at bay.

Weeds don’t seem that harmful on the surface, though. Cute little baby sprouts around your plants don’t seem all that imposing, so what’s the point? Or maybe you don’t have the time to pull all those darn weeds, so you leave them to grow. You’ll get to them next weekend.

But before you know it, these weeds have stunted your garden. They compete for nutrients, sun, soil space, water, everything – and before you know it, your tomatoes all have blossom end rot and your daises are crowded out by the dandelions.

This happens in life, too. Every person has that one friend or coworker who just seem to suck the life out of you. It’s always a competition and you feel like you’re being suffocated. They feed off of you, always take, take, take and they never give back.

You just gotta pull those weeds, people. Pull them out of your life and don’t look back. Cultivate your garden of relationships and don’t let in those pesky weeds. You are much better off letting your real self shine through.

3 – Sometimes you need a change in perspective

I tend to be a shoot-from-the-hip flower gardener. I swoon over the wild-flower “English Garden” look. So I grow a bunch of flowers from seeds and when they are big enough, I go plopping them around the garden all willy-nilly. It’s a bit of organized chaos, but when it comes to flowers, that’s the look I love.

Plopping things randomly may look great, but it often doesn’t come out the way I expected. Most importantly, it doesn’t always work for the flowers. Flowers, just like humans, tend to grow best under very specific conditions.

So as my garden evolves, I try to help things along the best I can. Many times, the plants just need a little change of perspective. A transplant from a shady area to one with full sun. Or maybe from the rocky hill to the soil-rich bed. Sometimes they look better clumped together, other times they look better spread out.

What’s the magic combination? I have no idea. Every flower has different likes and dislikes, and sometimes a little change in location is needed to help them get along with their neighbors. Its like Jimmy Buffet’s “Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes” – you gotta keep trying until you find the right fit for your attitude!

One of our honeybees pollinating a Clematis flower

4 – The secret’s in the soil

I’m going to continue along those same lines and go a little further. Some plants in my garden have it all – great sunlight, perfect amount of rain, living near neighbors that they get along with, good vibes going their way, the whole deal. And yet, SOMEHOW, they refuse to grow.

I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what they wanted. No amount of questioning or moving helped me figure it out. Until I added a little nitrogen to the fertilizer.

You know what I discovered? The secret is in the soil.

Any plant can grow with just the necessities. But to flourish – to really grow beyond belief – the secret is in the soil. Tomatoes love nitrogen and calcium. My cucumbers love Epsom salts. Every plant will blossom under the certain circumstances.

And humans are the same! Take any one person and transplant them somewhere else. Maybe it works out, maybe it doesn’t. For example – put a gifted writer in a computer coding class and they will flounder. Send that same writer to a fiction writing summer camp, however, and they will absolutely blossom.

You need the right conditions to grow beyond expectations. Keep on trying until you find the perfect mix for you!

5 – You harvest what you sow

Last year, I didn’t plant a single head of lettuce. You know how many heads of lettuce I harvested?

Zero. (Of course!)

Last year, I also planted about 10 lupines. You know how many blossomed last year?

Also zero.

But you know how many blossomed this year? Three.

Gardens take some time to grow. They take time and energy and effort to get going, to grow stable root systems and blossom. You simply cannot expect to put 10 seeds into the ground and get 10 gorgeous plants within a few months.

So why do we do this with life?

If we move into a house, we expect everything to be perfectly decorated – immediately. When we get a new job, we get frustrated if the first week doesn’t go well. Or when we put in extra effort to get that project done and no one noticed.

We all want a first class life on a shoestring budget. And we expect 100% success rate from every little effort, with immediate results. One day of extra effort doesn’t guarantee you a life of luxury. Months and years of extra effort? NOW you’re adding that secret ingredient to the soil!!

Gardens take lots of TLC – just like life. With gardens, you take the time, put in the energy, and reap the rewards. We need to transfer this into our own fast-paced lives and slow down. Put in a little more TLC to the area we want to get more out of. Maybe that’s your family. Maybe that’s your job. But don’t be afraid to spread the love.

Enjoy the journey of life. Take the time to let your garden grow. Then reap the rewards of a VERY plentiful harvest.

 

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